Getting Real

As if being a wife and mother wasn't stressful enough, when you're a homeschooling mom you add in all of the insecurities about "Am I teaching them enough?  Will I do a good job?  Will all of this be worth it when they are grown?"  not to mention the crap you get from unsupportive family/friends over your decisions.  People seem to think I am either nuts for being with my kids 24/7 or they seem to think I am some sort of alien super-breed of parent.......I am just a woman who has never wanted anything more than to be a mom to my family - I don't understand how women with demanding careers that keep them away from their kids can function. It's just not me. However, there is nothing about me even remotely resembling a supermom - I am a mom full of faults just like everyone else. So, in the spirit of making some other overwhelmed, self-doubting mother know she is not in this alone - here is my REALITY -------

1. I am not a patient person. I yell at my kids - some days much more than others. It's okay, I'm human. I also dish out way more hugs and snuggles since my kids are home with me.

2. I try to give my kids chores to help teach them responsibility, but some things are just easier done myself and so I do them. Then I complain that no one appreciates all that I do! Only sometimes.

3. As much as I try, and even though my DH pays for me to have a cleaning lady once a week --- there is dog hair on the floor, spills in the kitchen, counters that need to be cleared off, a pile (or two!) of laundry waiting to be done, etc. etc. etc. There are 8 people living in my house. There will be chaos, but this too shall pass when they are all grown up & gone and I will miss these messes.

4. Some days we are lucky to get out of bed and everyone dressed. Others, we're still in jammies and schoolwork is done. Will we have everything done on every single day? Probably not, but most of it done in whatever order on most days is adequate enough for me.

5. We don't do family devotions or even attend church. We have several preachers we watch on tv that we especially like - Joel Osteen & Joyce Meyer mostly.

6. Despite not attending church, my husband & I have some of the strongest faith of anyone you will meet - we simply feel we don't need to be in a building with others telling us what to do while they live their lives according to another set of rules. "Five card poker on Saturday night....church on Sunday morning...." We choose to lead by example to our children of God's love and plans for our lives.

7. I feed my kids cereal for breakfast far more than they would like. I am not a morning person. Not until I've had my coffee and it's closer to lunch. Pancakes and waffles and eggs are for weekends when I am feeling guilty and DH is here to benefit from my guilt.

8. I hide chocolate from my kids. There I said it. I hide it and tell them it's all gone and then when they go to bed, I sneak in the kitchen, get a big ol' glass of milk and my chocolate and take it back to my room to lie in bed and watch tv.

9. I use the tv in the afternoon to get an hour of peace while I make dinner. PBS channel with Dinosaur Train or Martha Speaks, but the evil tv none the less. Desperate times call for desperate measures - I love to cook, but not with screaming toddlers around my legs!

10. I hate to exercise and I love to eat. I am 15lbs overweight and as much as my mother continues to harp on me for it - I'm okay with it. I love my husband, he loves me and going out to eat is something we enjoy together so I'm not going to make myself miserable dieting or exercising at this stage in my life. I try to eat healthy and walk with the kids, but if I don't I don't stress it.